Keto Means
Keto Means
Photo: George Milton
One of the wildest innovations is “living funerals.” You can attend a dry run of your own funeral, complete with casket, mourners, funeral procession, etc. You can witness the lavish proceedings without having an “out-of-body” experience, just an “out-of-disposable-income” experience.
Here are 29 healthy, weight-loss-friendly snacks to add to your diet. Mixed nuts. ... Red bell pepper with guacamole. ... Greek yogurt and mixed...
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1. Eggs are among the best foods for flat abs since they are high in natural fat burning elements such as protein. In fact, eggs are a great choice...
Read More »My cousin’s husband owns a funeral home, so I’m anxious to hear his take on a front-page article from the Nov. 4 “Wall Street Journal.” According to the article, morticians are innovating ways to put the “fun” in funeral (including burial plot raffles and “open house” family events featuring food, live music and bouncy houses) — or maybe it was putting the “monument” in monumentally screwed up ideas! I get those mixed up. The article talked about undertakers enticing their potential customers to deal with the elephant in the room (their own mortality) and be more proactive about end-of-life planning. This will take the burden off your loved ones, so they will be tanned and rested and in a positively chipper mood as they fight over your estate. (“Step back from the Hummel figurines or I’m snatching you bald-headed … bless your heart …”) A funeral industry convention workshop was titled “How to build your pre-need customer pipeline,” which, I’m sorry, dredges up too many memories of my dearly departed childhood goldfish. Many undertakers report positive feedback for the laid-back attitude, but traditionalist customers are adamant that recent experiments in funeral marketing are disrespectful. (“We’ll talk more when I get back from the King Tut exhibit. Need any souvenirs?”) Some of today’s off-the-wall customized services leave me with mixed emotions. I can handle a funeral sanctioned by the Board of Funeral Directors and Embalmers, but not one sanctioned by the Board of Ouija. I suppose some ways of jazzing up the funeral experience are more tolerable than others. I could see a Grim Reaper with a tie-dyed robe, or a magician sawing someone’s ashes in half. I’m cool with a standup comedian whining, “Hey, I’m dying up here.” Tequila is probably a counterproductive libation for promotional events. It’s a real buzzkill to think about the worms biding their time to get their revenge. Whacking a piñata filled with organs some bozo failed to donate to medical science? Let’s not and say we did. And a mime trapped in an invisible box is probably not going to sell many funeral packages — unless you get to nominate the mime as your “plus one.” One of the wildest innovations is “living funerals.” You can attend a dry run of your own funeral, complete with casket, mourners, funeral procession, etc. You can witness the lavish proceedings without having an “out-of-body” experience, just an “out-of-disposable-income” experience. This supposedly gives you peace of mind, but it sounds more anxiety-producing to me. (“I knew it — Ralph came just for the free calendars, not for me! And why isn’t Mike hitting on my ‘surviving spouse’? Does that conceited jerk think he’s too good for her?”) Seriously, this is all artificial and skewed. Past performance is no guarantee of how your actual funeral will be in five, 10 or 20 years. A “living funeral” is like the “air guitar” of shuffling off this mortal coil, except the groupies are all hanging around the undertaker, who is raking in extra dough. As my son noted, this is a brilliant way to get consumers to pay for a service twice. Maybe other professions will follow the funeral industry’s lead. (“Just drink this awful liquid and sit on the potty all day. Then come back when you’re 40 and we’ll do all that again PLUS run a scope inside you. Let’s put endless co-pays in colonoscopy!”
14 Best Breakfast Foods for People with Diabetes Eggs. Eggs are delicious, versatile, and a great breakfast choice. ... Greek yogurt with berries....
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Can You Snack Too Much On Keto? The short answer is yes. If you over-consume any food—even a Keto-friendly food—consequences may follow. Weight...
Read More »The best way to avoid these side effects is to stick to shorter fasting periods of up to 24 hours — especially when you're just starting out. If you want to increase your fasting period to more than 72 hours, you should seek medical supervision.
Typical foods for a low-carb diet A daily limit of 0.7 to 2 ounces (20 to 57 grams) of carbohydrates is typical with a low-carb diet. These amounts...
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If you rely solely on the bathroom scale, you will never really know whether you are carrying body fat or extra water weight. The best way to know...
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A ketogenic diet should consist of about 60–80% fat, 10–30% protein, and no more than 5–10% — or 20–50 grams — of carbs per day. Focus on high fat,...
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Consuming too many carbs can kick your body out of ketosis — and it takes several days to 1 week to get back into it. In the meantime, your weight...
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